又中又英——butt of jokes

　　When will the run on toilet paper end? It is making Hong Kong the butt of jokes. I am running low on toilet paper. But all the supermarkets I've gone to have run out of toilet paper. Selfish people have been bulk-buying toilet paper and rice. My overseas friends have made this bulk-buying the butt of jokes. Have you noticed I have used the word "run" three times but with different meanings? It is a very versatile (adaptable) word. If there is a run on something, it means a lot of people are suddenly buying the same thing. If you are running low on something, it means you don't have much left. If something has run out, it means there is none left.
　　The word "bulk" describes something very large. To bulk-buy something means to buy a lot of it. When you are the butt of jokes, it means everyone is making fun or joking about you. Many of my overseas friends are making fun of Hong Kong people for bulk-buying rice and toilet paper. They said Hong Kong has become the butt of jokes. It is very clever to use the expression "butt of jokes" for Hong Kong people bulk-buying toilet paper because the word "butt" is a slang word for buttocks or anus. My friends joked about Hong Kong people bulk-buying rice and toilet paper by pointing out that eating too much white rice causes constipation. People who have constipation won't need too much toilet paper.
　　It is true that eating too much white rice causes constipation. White rice has very little fibre compared to brown rice. White is not the natural colour of rice. It becomes white after the husk and bran are removed. The rice is then polished to become white. Husk and bran are the outer coverings of rice and seeds. They have healthy fibre and nutrients. Brown rice, which contains husk and bran, does not cause constipation. I hope Hong Kong's selfish people will only bulk-buy white rice so I can buy brown rice. And I hope they get constipation.
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　　到底疯买（the run on）厕纸的热潮，几时才会完？这已经令香港沦为笑柄（butt of jokes）了。我的厕纸快用完（running low）了，但我去的所有超级市场的厕纸都卖光（run out）了。自私的人都在大量购买（bulk-buying）厕纸和米。我的海外朋友已经将这种「爆买」（bulk-buying）的情况当成笑话（butt of jokes）。你可有留意到，我用了三次“run”这个字，但三次都是不同的意思？这是一个非常万用的（versatile）字。若有 a run on something，意即突然有许多人在买同一样物件；若你是 running low on something，意即那物所余无几、快用完了；若某事已 run out，意即一件都没有了。
　　Bulk是形容某物体积很大，又或很大量。To bulk-buy something就是大量购买某物。若你成为了the butt of jokes，即人人都在取笑你。我的许多海外朋友都在嘲笑香港人大量购买（bulk-buying）米和厕纸。他们说，香港已沦为笑柄（butt of jokes）。香港人大量购买（bulk-buying）厕纸，用上习语“butt of jokes”实在非常高明，因为butt也是屁股又或肛门的俚语。我的朋友们调侃香港人大量购买（bulk-buying）米和厕纸，可其实吃太多白饭会导致便秘；有便秘的人又何需用那么多厕纸呢。确实，吃白饭太多会导致便秘。相比起糙米，白米含非常少的纤维。白色也不是米本身的天然色，只是在脱去稻壳（husk）和米糠（bran），再经过打磨后它才变白。Husk和bran就是稻米和种子的外壳、外皮，它们含有丰富的纤维和营养。糙米有稻壳（husk）和米糠（bran），就不会导致便秘。我希望香港那些自私的人只会大量购买（bulk-buy）白米，好让我能够买到糙米。我也希望他们会便秘呢。
中译：七刻
Michael Chugani 褚简宁